Nathan Judd

In many respects Nathan was quite a successful character. His well-paid job writing code gave him some very interesting connections in the hacking world and his wages allowed him a comfortable, two-dimensional, lifestyle. His turbo-charged Toyota MR2 was a hit with the ladies, as were his boyish good looks, charm and quick tounge. However, those that knew him well referred to him as a ‘bit of a cock’. His behaviour erred on the side of immature and he was renowned for his collection of T-shirts sporting cheesy motifs, including: ‘Barbie’s a slut (by Sindy), ‘Re-hab is for quitters’ and ‘Smoke crack, worship Satan’. He was wearing the latter when he found Jacob in the queue at the post office one hot afternoon.

‘Hey, alright mate?’
‘Alright. Um, Nathan isn’t it?’
‘Yeah. Good craic the other night eh, Jake?’
‘Yeah, sorry about that. I got a bit messy.’
‘Nah, that’s cool. Can’t fucking remember much apart from that fucking TV theme hits album on at full pelt.’
‘Jesus. That’s right, ‘bout 4ish that was.’
‘You were dancing to Minder mate. Those pills were lunatic.’
‘How d’you know Jonti then?’
‘Known him years. He’s alright – lost it a bit though.’
‘His bird’s well stacked isn’t she?’
‘Yeah, and she takes it in the Gary Glitter.’

The number of people queueing in the boiling heat was considerable and, thanks to the unsavoury conversation, tensions were running high for some of the older customers. Nathan beamed proudly and puffed out his chest for optimum T-shirt slogan effect as he caught the eye of the local rector who had just popped in to renew his car tax.